How You’re Destroying Your Growth and What to Do Instead


Want to destroy all possibilities of your personal growth with one sentence? Here it is: It won’t work for me because…

As a former personal finance blogger and now a productivity coach, I’ve seen this one sentence keep people from making progress on their goals over and over again. Even if you didn’t say it out loud, you probably thought so. I know I have!

The problem with this short sentence is that it immediately puts you on the defensive, fighting against change, trying to poke holes in any possible solution. Yes, your life is unique and most advice will not work for you. But when you look for reasons why it won’t work, you miss out on what you could have learned and applied.

So the next time you’re reading a personal development book, taking an online course, looking for help on Pinterest, or listening to a TedTalk, ask yourself these 3 questions:

1. How can I do this work for me?

Whatever problems you give, your mind likes to be busy. Instead of asking your mind about the reasons why something won’t work for you, set your mind to figure out how you can make something work for you.

Your irregular schedule may not allow you to follow the regular daily exercise routine recommended by your trainer. Don’t dismiss advice outright. How can you make it work for you? Think of it as customizing what you learn to support your success.

2. What can I share from this advice and apply in my own life?

You may not be able to apply 100% of what you learn, but you can take pieces and pieces to apply in your own life. Imagine you are taking a course on Pinterest marketing strategy, but it is more geared towards helping food bloggers and you have a service based business. Some of the strategies taught will not work for you. It does not mean that the entire syllabus is a waste of time and money. What parts of the course can you apply to your marketing strategy? If you are always on the lookout for information that you can apply, you will keep growing and moving forward.

“Be patient with yourself. Self-growth is tender; it is holy ground. There is no greater investment.” – Stephen Covey

3. If I could do this for me, what would it look like?

Let’s imagine that what you are learning might work for you. How does that feel? Sometimes we get so caught up in our current habits and routines that we feel like the way we do things is permanent. Asking this question can help you reevaluate your life and look at it from a new perspective.

Maybe adding exercise, meditation, and 20 minutes of reading advice to your morning routine is wonderful but impossible. You have many reasons why this won’t work for you. But imagine for a minute that you can make it work for you. How does that feel?

You may need to wake up earlier, rework your childcare support, go to bed earlier, or go to work later. You no longer want to do some or all of those things to create that new morning routine, but by imagining what it will look like, you stretch your mind to see more options for your life. It puts you in control to decide what you do and don’t want to do instead of getting stuck in your current situation.

Whenever you start thinkingIt won’t work for me because…“You lock yourself out of all possible growth and learning. You miss out on the little things of goodness that you can apply to your life.

Instead, ask yourself these three questions:

  • How can I do this work for me?
  • What can I share from this advice and apply in my own life?
  • If I could do this for me, what would it look like?

These three questions will set your mind to figure out what you can apply and will pull you to see more options available to you.